don't be hoein me girl.

Audrey made my day by wearing the Novi hoodie. I am happier than ever that I have Spanish with Josh. Mrs. Massucci is hilarious, and I'm glad Josh and I could finally get along in class.

there's buttons on my underwear !

Leslie and Chase, mann. They make history worth it. (: I hate Mrs. Bennett, and I'm glad she won't be there tomorrow. New shit in spanish, really easy. I wish Jessi was there. Sub in English. Missy made my day. (: I no longer dislike Stephanie and am glad she shared some information with me. I actually sat down at lunch today! Courtney ate with us too ! Lauren. I would probably hate 5th hour without her. I am glad I decided to tell the class that Mr. Hinchman looks like Al from Home Improvement. Jessica was annoying me, but oh well. I wish mom would have let me go to Mcdonalds. Tomorrow should be fun. (:

"We love you a lot more when you're not friends with Ashley and Dominique. And we like you with Adam. You're the happiest we've ever seen you." I love Haley and Rachel.

"You're my best friend. I got you."

i was just thinking that. NO YOU WEREN'T !

It's been a good weekend. I don't wanna go to school tomorrow.

he literally licked her !

I saw a guy full out lick a girl!

I saw a lady get hit by a car!

Harold and Maud returned!

Plus, I was with Adam all day!

What a great day!

THE BEST FRICKEN DAY!

So I was soo right when I said today was gonna be a great day, but who knew that it was actually going to be this great!

I am now in a relationship! Third try with Adam and I really think it's gonna last awhile this time. (:

The way that he asked was just like so cute, like even Leslie thought so! I did not expect it to be like that, but man! It was great!

My happiness stayed with me throughout the day. History was simple today. Algebra was confusing, but I didn't let it ruin my mood. The other team in Spanish today definatley cheated with their codes. "FROG!" "LION!" Lmao, I love Jessi. Courtney beat me every fricken time! I was pissed mannn ! English was simple being as Jessica and I shared work. We should do that more often. Brandon's reaction when he found out was priceless! Omg, I was trying so hard not to laugh! For real, lmao. And Alfonso ! Lmao, he's so fricken dumb. And definately jealous. Mr. O'brien is a jerk and needs to stop changing his mind. Lauren though! Mann, she's overall great ! Lmfao, and walking in the hallway with her. "AHHH ! AHHH !" Lmfao, I thought I was gonna pee my pants. Omfg, I love Jessica Kassis forever now because she brought me Mrs. Field's cookies. I was so fricken happy mann. It was just a great day.

It sucks that Adam lost both of his baseball games though. :( But oh well. It was fun to hang out with Josh and Becca and I am glad they're finally together! The walk to Adam's house was fricken amazing! Adam is general is amazing. (: It definatley would have been worth it if we ended up getting in trouble. But we didn't! Wow, I'm so happy. (:

only wanna be with you. NOT YOU !

Worksheet, Leslie, Chase.

New shit, Confusion, Tyler.

Game, Jessi, YO GANO!

Work, Maxwell, Texting.

Fate, Haley, Adam.

Realtor.com, Houses, Lauren.

Coloring, Hinchman, Jessica.

ANOTHER GREAT DAY!

Tomorrow will be even better!

it's been 18 days,

Great day. (:
Pearl Harbor= best movie I've seen in a looong time. Leslie is still amazing.

Algebra= pointless.
Spanish= Jessi is hilarious. I loved our drawings.
English= omfg, Mrs. Wells is a bitch! I love Kayla.
Lauren= She continue to makes my day and seriously makes th hour worthwhile. I love our flip flop searching and the man in the bucket. Lauren, she's just amazing.
Jessica= Everyday I am more thankful for her. I don't know what I'd do without her sometimes. She makes my 6th hour. And I cannot waitttt to see this sign. (:
BRAWWWH (:
After school is just amazing. I love hanging out with Lauren, and Rachel, and Haley. And with Leslie there, it's a bonus. Same with Josh. We always have a great time, all of us. I love them allll. I couldn't stop laughing.
Adam= amazing, that's all I have to say.


I think this is a sign. Things don't work out for you the exact same day they fall for me. It means something. I don't know what, but something. And I really have a good feeling about this.

you were laughing so hard when i said he never kissed a girl.

Pearl Harbor. Leslie is amazing. Parabolas. 100% on algebra test. Mischevious. I love Jessi. Personification. Kayla is hilarious. Apply Your Knowledge. Lauren for sure made my day. Kingdoms. Jessica makes me laugh. Anger. I wanted to punch someone. Depression. I feel bad for Josh. Basketball next week. I want to see Mike. Birdwalk. I can't dance. Saturday. I cannot fricken wait!

you deserve the best.

Hung out with Haley and Rachel all day. Attempted to walk to Robert's house today. Went to Mcdonalds with Leslie, Pooja, and Sarah +Haley and Rachel today. I had a good day.

"dick sucking vag licking LARKINS fucker."

we're all larkins victims.

I hung out with Rachel and Haley today. It was fun. I am looking forward to hanging out with them again. That fat chick seriously made my day, not gonna lie. It was a good day.

"What's wrong?"

"Yer so far."

let's ride the roller coaster, whooo !

Today was a pretty good day. I went to the craft show for awhile. Hung out with Rachel, Leslie and Pooja. I had so much fun! I'm growing to love pretty much the whole JV Soccer Team. (: I can't wait for their next game. I saw Chase today! He danced, and I could not stop laughing. I colored a lot and cleaned my room for once! I am looking forward to hanging out with Rachel and Haley tomorrow! It should be a blast. (:

"But remember, I hate him. I'd be at Stevenson this very second grinding on some hot ass sexy mother fuckers if it wasn't for him. ):<"

---Lmfao, I love Jessica.

i will sweet kacha jab you!

So what a great day! I was so pissed when Mrs. Hruska turned off Pearl Harbor right when it was getting to the good part! Omfg, I cannot wait to finish watching it. I'm actually liking this movie ! But Mrs. Bennett is annoying, and I want to hit her. Tyler is hilarious, and I'm really glad he doesn't hate me anymore. Brandon is the nicest kid in the world. I don't even have to ask for him to do anything and he just does it. What a cutie! MRS. BITCH BAKER WAS OUR SUB IN SPANISH TODAY! I cannot stand that lady. I want to kill her. She made me stop with my homework. Like what the fuck, man. No! I ended up doing it anyway. Haha. It's time for the story of the day! So I was walking out of third hour with Jake and this chick runs to her friend and she's like "There's puke right in front of my locker!" And Jake's like, "EW! There's puke right in front of her locker!" So he's looking at the ground looking for it. And he couldn't find it so he gave up. But at the most perfect timing ever he looked down and saw it. He pushed me the other way and screamed, "OMG! I ALMOST JUST STEPPED IN IT!" It was the funniest thing EVER! And then he went and told Sam about it. And now I think that she knows that it was me on the phone. Ughh. Oh well. She's funny. (: Anyway, english was actually fun today and I feel like I am connecting with Kayla. That really makes me happy cause she's a pretty sweet chick! I have come to realize that Alfonso is the most jealous person I have ever met in my life. And it needs to stop soon. Haley and I visited Rachel in Mr. O's class today! I miss him so much. I had a good time. And we're making it a point to visit every Friday. (: Lauren has the best stories in the world and fifth hour would not be enjoyable without her. The only thing I dislike about Mr. Hinchman as of now is the fact that he makes us watch dumb movies. Karlee and I are working things out now. There's no problems anymore. That's a good thing, BRAWWHH ! Hahaha. I went to Rachel's soccer game with Haley today. Rachel's dad is the funniest man in the world ! Haha. I had a good time besides the fact that I was freezing my ass off. I was so disappointed that the Cheetos didn't even taste like Cheetos. :( Oh well, I'm over it. I had a good time with Haley today. And I hope we start to hang out more often. I started talking to someone new today. I get this bad feeling about. I think that something is going to go completely wrong. I'm gonna get caught, I can feel it. And to think that all of it happened because of me? I feel terrible. I hope everything works out.

guess what?! CHICKEN BUTT!

Omg, I for real thought today would never end. Watching Pearl Harbor in first hour was fun. It's good so far and I'm excited to see what happens next. It was kinda strange though because Chase was not there! :( I fricken hate math more than anything in the world, and I hate Mrs. Bennett even more. I wish Tyler lived down the street that way he could help me with the homework everyday. It was really cool of Jake to not go to Joe's locker. :( Oh well. He definatley made me feel better in third hour when he tried the whole guess what across the classroom thing and I did not! fall for it for once. (: Awh, what a cutie. I Stand Here Ironing was probably the best short story that I have read all year. It was so depressing, but for some reason I loved it, especially the end. My day was definately made at lunch when Billy decided to try to squeeze Dylan's juice on Dylan's back, but then it came out the other end and exploded all over Billy's pants. Lmfao, funniest thing ever. But total HTBT moment, as Adam would say. (: I'm disliking Mr. O'Brien more and more every single time I show up for his stupid class. He is extremely annoying. I have decided that I like Mr. Hinchman, just not when he's doing notes. I also think I need to stop spending so much time with Jessica, because she's beginning to annoy the shit out of me. I'm really excited to see what this song Dylan is writing is going to sound like. And same with the poem from Jake. I gave them a deadline, next Friday. I wonder if they're actually going to meet it. Tomorrow should be fun. Going to Rachel's soccer game with Haley, hopefully. I feel like something is going to go wrong. I really hope not. :( Wow! Mom pissed me off so much today. I seriously do not see any problem in going to Citgo to hang out with Kevin and Jake. Like really? Apparently I was going to get hit by a car? No, definatley not. I'm not a dumbass. I know when not to walk in the street. Whatever. She needed to be punched. But at least I did end up hanging out with Kevin, I think... I lost all trust in Josh today. I can't tell him anything anymore without him telling mom. She really does not need to know. Too many people have been getting bitched at lately for no reason at all. I'm beginning to think it's my fault... I need to calm down and just go to bed.

i'm gonna carry around a box of dryer sheets for you.

Today was a great day ! I hung out with Haley. It was fun ! That was basically the highlight of my day. Besides the whole "Oh well, she's a bitch anyway!" Lmfao, (:

I'm happy. :D

wanna go to stevenson and beg for one?

I have decided to accept the reappearance of a single soul in my life- things can be better this way.

I have decided to shut out the person who used me then tried to get back in- this makes me smarter.

I have decided to let go of the human being who I know is not worth my time- this makes me stronger.

I have decided to give up on trying to make people I care about happy- it seriously never works.

I have decided to stop getting so disappointed when things don't work out- there is always hope.

I have decided to try to be a nicer person to someone who is always nice to me- that's not working too well.

I have decided to stop making so many hard decisions in one day- it's way too fricken exhausting.

why can't you just let me like you?

Today I realized how good of a friend an ex-friend can be. I realized how if I have this one person, then I don't need anyone else. I realized how bad it actually hurts to be hurt. I realized that I have given way too much credit to someone who deserves none. I realized that it's easier to not care,rather than caring too much. I realized how the biggest annoyance of my life can also be the best thing that's happened to me. I realized there is someone who will always be there for me, even when I don't want them there. I realized that it's about 100 times better to live for right now, than it is to live in the past.

i'm thinking of you.

Honestly, today was the most boring day of my life. I almost killed myself while riding my bike. And I realized that Josh is definately the most annoying person in the world, and I want to hit him. I am actually looking forward to going to school tomorrow. I need to get out of this house and away from these people.

no pizza!

I hung out with Maria and Megan today. It was awkward, but extremely fun at the same time. It was today that I realized how close they really are. And honestly, it seemed like Maria and I aren't even best friends anymore. It's definatley her and Megan, and I'm shit.

will fuck u for $1.84.

It's seriously amazing how the minute you come back into my life, everything starts to go wrong. The past few days I felt carefree. Like I didn't have to worry about anything anymore. I felt like nothing could possibly go wrong. I knew that without you in my life, I could finally be happy. But remember how happy I was when you first entered my life? I was literally always smiling and there was not one thing that could make the smile go away. Eventually, all of this just started to fade. It got to the point where everyday I had to worry about what was going to happen the next day and the day after that. I couldn't handle it anymore. I didn't know what to do. I have never felt like that before. I will be completely honest here and admit that the minute you left, I wanted you back. I didn't want to see you go. Nothing made sense to me and I wanted to figure it all out. And I wasn't gonna quit until I knew what it was. But then something happened. I finally realized that without you, I could get along so much easier; so much better. I felt happy again. And then you know what happened today? You randomly decide to re-enter my life. I didn't think it would matter at all. But then I saw you. And then I listened to you. And then suddenly, all I wanted was to be with you again. I wanted things to go back to how they were before. But I can't always get what I want- I know this; I learned this. I'm smarter now than I was before. And I'm not going to allow myself to continue on and fight for what I want. It's not right. I know it and so does everyone else. And as much as it hurts me to say this, I know I'm better off without you anyway.

i'm on around the block butt control!

Each day is getting more and more enjoyable, not gonna lie. (:

you're gay.

Woww, so what a great day, honestly. The only thing that ruined it was the fact that Josh is telling everyone that I'm dating Mike. Uhm, definately not ever going to happen again. And the other thing that ruined it was the fact that my brother Josh was being a complete dickhead while hanging out with Robert/o. Whateverr, I'm over it. And I'm happy right now. I don't see things getting worse. But everytime I say that, then they just do get worse. Oh well. I like the fact that Brian and I are talking again. (: I actually missed him. But I don't like the fact that more and more people are finding out about the whole John Gardner issue... It's my own fault. I can't keep my mouth shut. I need to learn how to do that... Well anway, my walk home from school today was really fun too. I love Jake. (: And I am so surprised that he actually called ! Lauren, Haley, Rachel and I hung out again today. It wasn't all that fun, to be honest. Rachel and Haley completely leave Lauren and I out of everything. It's kinda upsetting and really annoying. I seriously don't see us all hanging out that much anymore. But I guess everything happens for a reason, right? Yeah, it's whatever.

i hate the rain.

Today I was bombarded with people wanting to hang out. I can't even count how many times I was actually asked. Of course, I had to turn all the opportunities down. I'm so dumb, and I know I shouldn't have. I didn't really want to hang out with anyone though. And the person who I actually did want to hang out with, could hang out! And everything was set and I was just about ready to leave. And then guess what happened?! It started raining. The rain ruined my day.

i can't wait for yoshi to get in my pants.

It's unbelievable how the lack of one person can affect your life completely, with no reasonable explanation. It's so strange how someone who you never usually talk to can be on your mind all day, and all you want to do is talk to them. And you want to tell the world how happy you are, but everytime you try, you just can't do it. Have you ever gotten that feeling where something so completely awkward feels so completely right at the exact same time? And then you're just so tempted to do something about it, but you don't because you don't want to ruin the greatness of the moment. I absolutely love that feeling and I don't want it to go away.

things are better this way.

It seriously amazes me how many doors open after one closes.

I saw Confessions of a Shopaholic today with Maria and Megan. Surprisingly, I liked it.

Apparently I'm getting prettier. I think that is a good thing. I cannot believe how many people cheered me up today just by talking to me.

fuck change.

No one could hang out today. I hate it when that happens. At least Josh is always there to hang out with. We had a good time. He's so dumb.

So, there was an end to CJ and I today. Kinda depressing. But whatever. He was being a jerk about this whole thing. He has been ever since we started dating. I don't understand what the problem is, but whatever. I don't care. Well, obviously I care. it's upsetting. It really is. Like, he was actually someone who meant a lot to me. I CHANGED FOR HIM. Someone like me doens't just change for anyone. Obviously, he had to have meant something to me. I just don't understand. I didn't do anything wrong. It was all him. I'm upset, but I'm not gonna let it get to me. He's not worth my time.

But if anything, today I realized who will actually be there for me and who actually cares. I can't believe that I was about to give almost everything up and let everyone go. Everything happens for a reason. I'll be fine. I know who I need now, and I'm happy with them. I'm not gonna let some stupid fatass like CJ ruin my life. I'm done. I honestly just don't care anymore.

the first day of bike riding since the summer !

I seriously love half days ! Everything went by so quickly, but my teacher's were being bitchier than ever. ):

After school was fun, I guess. It was fun to hang out with Adam and Ashley. Adam is hilarious. And Ashley and I finally got to ride our bikes !

It was also fun to hang out with Alfonso, and I hope that he is okay.

everything will be okay.

Today was probably the worst day of the year of 2009 so far. I was upset with CJ, but honestly, what day am I not? Today it was much worse though. I worry and I freak out and I lose all confidence in things getting better. So what do I do next? I talk to Adam. And for some reason, he always knows what is going on and how to help. I wouldn't have made it through the day without him. I live for the moments where I get this strange feeling that everything is going to be okay, and I actually believe it. I was more than happy to recieve that feeling today, and now I know everything will always be okay.

let's have sex in the bathroom.

Wow, what a day. As usual, I was happier in the morning and felt reassured. Then by the time first hour hit, I was upset. I cannot pass a test if my life depended on it. I ended up failing my math one too. And I am extremely jealous of tyler for being so smart and getting a 100% on everything. I don't think I'll ever be able to go a day in 3rd hour without mentioning how I miss Amanda. If she was still my partner, she wouldn't have messed up, I know it. I absolutely hate Mrs. Wells. As each day goes on, I am beginning to dislike lunch more and more. It would be perfect without Alfonso. I hate excel. It seriously ruins my life and I am not looking forward to starting access within the next two weeks. I want to punch Mr. Hinchman and his stupid packets that take days. Lately, it seems the only two I tell things too are Adam and Jessica. I'm glad they're around. It was great to hang out with Lauren, Haley and Rachel again. I didn't realize how much I missed them until now.

it's square root day!

The day dragged on and on and on and on and on. I seriously thought it would never end.

I was kind of frusterated all day and I'm not sure why. I pretty much only had two things on my mind all day- how much sleep I needed, and my random worries. It kinda sucked...

It was a good thing that Jessi forced me to do our dialouge today though. We did fricken amazing! But I still miss Amanda... ):

After school today was a good time. Like seriously, I had fun. I never thought that the most annoying guys in the world would be pretty much the most fun people to hang out wtih.

Seriously, thank God for Adam. I don't know if I would have been able to survive today without him. I now know that he is always going to be there, no matter what I do. He made me realize a few things today. And it's kinda sad because everything that he said about my current situation is right. Like, I don't want him to be right though. But he is! It's unbelievable, man. I think that I am going to take his advice though. Like seriously, only good things should come from it. And if not, then he's right again. I need to be myself from now on, not the bitch that I was before.

let me rest in pieces.

I guess today was an okay day. It really pissed me off how Amanda isn't my partner anymore. I am for real going to miss her. I've heard some things that I didn't really want to hear. It kinda sucks. I realized who my real friends are and those are the ones I'm not going to let walk out of my life. I feel a random sense of disattachment, and guess what? I'm scared out of my mind.

tell me what it was like, ass wipe!

I hung out with Maria today for the first time in a long time. I had a lot of fun. I can't wait til next time I see her. I have missed her. (: